Roger Ailes Was "The Loudest Voice in the Room" - Look What Happened to His Career ...

"I'm not a lawyer. And, I don't have any legal stuff going on."

That was the reaction of a client for whom I was doing a Tarot reading. The Justice card came up. And he was annoyed. He had contacted me for a Tarot reading because he had missed out on a promotion at work. His focus was totally on career.

"Creating a sense of fair play in our professional lives involves listening. The Justice card is about listening to all those other 'sides of the story.'" 

That's what I explained. Gently. The Tarot is gentle in the lessons it extracts from our individual unconscious and the collective unconscious.

Together, he and I took a look at how willing and how effective he has been at listening in his office, in networking, and when just having those conversation snippets with neighbors. (The latter can be significant in a career because, as sociologist Mark Granovetter documented, unique career information and opportunities come from "weak ties" or those not on our usual professional networks.)

Along the way in his career, ranging from the competitive arena of an elite graduate business school to the interview process for good jobs and promotions to supervising subordinates listening never seemed to be a valued skill. What had been enouraged was dominating the conversation. Or, at least, that is what he had picked up about rules of the success game. And that had been the game the late founder of Fox News Roger Ailes had played. Eventually he had  talked his way out of that big job. 

And that is what was standing between my client and big-time succcess. Over and over in analyzing the success strategies of those who are at the top of their professions, we find this: listening is a trait they have in common. And they have staying power. 

Why is that so? 

Well, listening is the prerequisite for empathy. With all constituencies, within and outside the organization, leaders such as former Disney head Bob Iger and current Paul Weiss law firm Chairperson Brad Karp have empathy as their signature brand. Those seemingly incapable of listening such as former VW head Herbert Diess don't. And, they usually won't last long because they can't build up the multi-layered support needed to get things down through people. Or protect them during crisis. Diess had been ousted from VW.

So, how to begin to listen? Here are the 4 must-dos:

• Be respectful. Of everyone. And you will give them the time to jaw-jaw. On a raw pragmatic level, as Granovetter hammered, it's that person far off your professional radar who could be the most useful in a career. Getting in the habit of valuing all human beings slows you down long enough to take in the world beyond your tight agenda.

• Ask friendly, non-invasive questions. That sets the conversation in play. A treasured ice-breaker is about their children, grandchildren, or animal companions. That's important to them, so it should be important to you. Interestingly, a recent Insider article about Karp about his accomplishments and possible future notes how that family narrative often frontloads his meetings with powerful clients such as Wall Street players. In my first interaction with him in March 2020 we talked about his children. In his holiday communication with me in December 2021, Karp asked about my cat. 

• Shut down the committee in your head. All that usual chatter blocks the ability to pick up what is really being said. That is, the subtext of the interation. Recently I had ended a relationship going back to my doctoral studies because the woman had become consumed with those "inner terrorists," that is, the voices in her head. Mostly, it was sad for me to conclude, her focus was totally on herself. She hadn't dug down to the subtext of my mentioning I had had a flat on my way from Connecticut to Arizona. I needed to sort out the trauma. Her response? She went on and on about a flat she had had on the way to the beach five miles from her house. 

• Be concise when there's an opening for you to talk. That increases the odds that those in the loop who can further your career will, yes, listen to what you have to say. Think about it: How many details about the mortgage for your getaway do they really want to hear? Actually maybe none. So, along with this, figure out what conversation topics of a mutual interest. BTW, the getaway topic could alienate since they can't afford a second home.

If you aren't making progress in listening, then you could invest in taking a Dale Carnegie Systems course. When I my industry had collapsed after 9/11, I did just that. The instructor Michael Francoeur calmed the chatter in my head. I was back in the external world, listening. Within six months I had started a communications boutique specializing in digital communications. Currently, Francoeur provides remote training as well as one-on-one coaching (michael.francoeur@dalecarnegie.com).

Purpose-driven intuitive career coaching, including Tarot Readings. For more information or a complimentary consultation, please contact janegenova374@gmail.com or text 203-468-8579.