Save Your Life - Embrace Your Shadow Side

"I hide."

That's what a new client for a Tarot reading blurted out. As we sorted through the confusion and pain what also tumbled out was that they also hid from themselves. 

This is an epidemic in societies with rigid oughts about who we must be: as social creatures, professionals, parents and more. The message is harsh: If we don't fit into those definitions of a self, we can't become a member of the group. So we decide to try not to be seen, at least not as we are. 

That issue of not letting others see us, as we are with all our flaws, had been the topic of today's Sunday Meditation Practice at the Cochise Zen Center, Bisbee, Arizona (accessible in-person and by Zoom). The presenter had been Zen Master Hye Mun (Barry Briggs.) Every Thursday there is also a meditation practice (only on Zoom). You can reach the Center to sign up for Zoom at cochisezen@icloud.com.

Essentially Briggs reinforced the reality that we humans are profoundly flawed. That echoes the meme of William Shakespeare that humans are "cankered in the grain." The Roman Catholic Church labels the condition "Original Sin." Psychologist Carl Yung calls it our "shadow side." 

To get out of hiding we have to accept ourselves as we are. Briggs refers to that state of being as a "train wreck." Then we can go on from there, if we choose to. The motivation usually is triggered by pain. Buddhist spiritual leader Pema Chodron counsels that to ease our suffering we have to start from where we are. Not where we think we are. Not where we assume we should be. 

The Tarot, as The New York Times documented, is a tool for that kind of self-awareness. Together with Spirit, we locate the self. Then we question what that self wants to evolve into. There are no oughts. There is only a determination to reduce your suffering. Let the probing start.

What clients uncover is no secret to the outside world. Yes, people are always watching. Usually they see the "me" underneath all those layers of concealment. When there is acceptance of the self as it is and the joy of knowing it could be heading where we want it to be we can shrug off what the watchers might say. A nice side effect is that we can forgive ourselves.

One client (identity masked) embraced that they were greedy, addicted to the grind and downright mean to younger members at the firm. Once that was acknowledged they could figure out what traits the business really required for success and what just caused them health problems. Their was no objective of becoming "a nice guy." The push was to save their life. They accomplished that, still alive when opting to retire. Retirement was their decision.

Tarot Card Reader. Intuitive Career Coach. Medium.

It’s not what happens. It’s how you handle it.

Empathy and compassion.

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